Monday, June 10, 2013

Turkish Airlines: Service With a Twist

When traveling great distances, it is only normal to expect an occasional delay here and there. A mudslide taking out the only direct road between two Colombian cities, resulting in a 12 hour "sight-seeing detour" of the entire countryside (Bus Ride to Medellin). A distraught airline passenger, unhappy that the in-flight service received was not up to his expectations, does the only logical thing, and threatens to murder the entire flight crew (Flight to Paris). And of course the latest misadventure, Turkish Airlines guide to "How to Be the Worst Airline Possible, Yes, Even Worse Than Spirit Airlines."

Knowing fully well that these blogs thrive on the utilization of sarcasm to express discontent, Turkish Airlines seemed dead-set on providing as much bloggable material as possible during what became a near-2-day journey from Austin --> Istanbul.

And while I would love to utilize a timeline to describe the occurrence of events, I feel I must mix up my method of describing such mishaps, as I attempt explore all the potential literary options at my disposable. Thus, I leave you with my newest form of summarization: The Jeopardy-inspired highlights of our 24 hour delay.

"Severe weather across the Atlantic" - Initial reason behind our delay, repeated every 1-2 hours from approximately 7PM (Fri) until 1AM (Sat).

"Lightning bolt that struck the original inbound aircraft, ripping apart the fuselage, and rendering the plane now a $100M piece of scrap metal" - The actual reason behind our delay. A small "technicality" if you will.

8:10AM (Sat) - The time at which we were informed of this slightly-relevant detail, only 15 hours after Turkish Airlines were notified themselves (who of course decided sharing such information would not benefit the 300+ people still awaiting to board a flight "delayed by weather").

A Random Passenger - The individual responsible for informing the line of anxious passengers of this small insignificant detail, in addition to what steps could be taken to remedy the situation. Yes, a passenger, She was met with quite the rousing applause while the crew looked upon her with confusion, as they apparently felt silence and inaction were the best way to deal with the situation.

1 - The # of Turkish Airline computers with the ability to re-book tickets after the passenger-inspired announcement was made.

0 - The # of Turkish airline workers with the ability to work such an advanced piece of technology.

8 - The # of Turkish airline workers who hoped that either staring aimlessly at the computer in confusion or tapping incessantly on the keyboard would inspire it to miraculously re-book the entire flight.

90 minutes - The length of time it took to re-book the first passenger in line. I am not sure how this was accomplished, although I can only assume it was done completely by accident. Not to worry though, as we were 3rd in line, we only had to wait 2 more hours after this point.

1 - The # of parents that used their baby as a prop as to gain sympathy and express frustration for the delay. His display was met with many "ooooh's", "oh be careful's" and of course "rabble rabbles"

42 hours - Total length of our trip, door-to-door, from Austin to Istanbul. This includes being re-routed through JFK (even though our flight from Houston landed us in Laguardia -- Yes Turkish Airlines, these are two different airports... .thanks for that added bonus to our journey!).

Onto the pics:
Waiting for the "weather" to dissapate (aka hole in plane to seal itself)
Nothing says "sorry for the delay" like dehydrated turkey sandwiches!
It's somewhat depressing that the nicest place we will stay our entire trip was only enjoyed for a 2 hour nap
Angry mob utilizing the "Prop Baby" approach to pass their message along to the confused Turkish Airline crew member
Waiting... this time at least in a new city!

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